My own little minion.

This morning, I called my dearest Chanelle to ask her who her favorite aunty was. She was kinda annoyed and I asked her a dozen times more and she got extremely annoyed and passed the phone to her uncle, my cousin Clinton. Clinton and I talked for a bit until I remembered that the original reason why I called was to tell Chanelle how my dog miscarried all her 6 puppies. This is how our conversation went:

Aunty Bea: Yo! Who's your favorite aunty???

Chanelle: eeeeeeeeeh

Aunty Bea: You know what, Miss Holly's puppies died today, they're all in pet heaven now. Aunty Bea feels sad.

Chanelle: Why?

Aunty Bea: I dunno. Next time she gets pregnant, I can give you a puppy if your mommy and daddy allows it you, ok?

Chanelle: OK. But I want a fish. Can you buy me a fish?

Aunty Bea: Why would you want a fish? They're boring.

Chanelle: I WANT A FISH.

Aunty Bea: Fine, fine. How many do you want?

Chanelle: Just one.

Aunty Bea: Ok. I'll bring it to your house on Thursday.

Chanelle: Oh, can you give me 2? A big one and a small one.

Aunty Bea: I can give you a small one, and it will grow and become big. You can name your fish.

Chanelle: No, no! I want one big and one small.

Aunty Bea: What for?

Chanelle: Para may minion sya.

Aunty Bea: What?! Para saan minion nya???

Chanelle: Dapat parati sya may minion. Kelangan may minion sya eh.

Aunty Bea: Ok fine, I'll buy your fish a minion. Who's your favorite aunty?

Chanelle: AUNTY BEYHA!!! YEEEEEY!

Aunty Bea: YEEEEEY!

Chanelle: Why are you so happy?

Aunty Bea: uh...

Mr. Perfect

A while ago, over a pitcher of Tang Mandarin Orange, Victor and I were seriously discussing the sad, sad state of my non existent love life. You see, I'm turning 26 in a month. 26. As JC David would say, that's already on the other side of your  20's.
When you're Chinese and 26 and just-got-back-to-zero-single, it's no joke. Thoughts of spinsterhood come creeping in every now and then. You think your market value declines a point every single day. And so in that second of worry and anxiety, I asked Victor to find me a Mr. Perfect.
He asked me for my requirements.

I only had 3.

1) Should be adventurous.
2) Should be driven, have goals, and have passion for whatever he does.
3) Should be able to buy me whatever that I can afford for myself.

Viola, right then and there, he thought of the perfect guy for me. With all 3 points in the bag.

Bruce Wayne

Or more popularly known as BATMAN.

True, true. Tama nga naman. 

1) Bruce Wayne is very adventurous. He's Batman, for crying out loud. Adventurous na, mysterious pa!

2) He's driven. Goal nya maka save ng madaming tao. And as far as I know, nagagawa nya naman diba?

3) He's rich. Batmobile and butler Alfred. 'nuff said.

 Victor says my requirements were ludicrously fictional. So ok, since I am bored and I wanna act like a 16 year old, here is my non-fictional Mr. Perfect.

time started: 7:36pm

1) He needs to have nice teeth.
2) Like Bruce Wayne, I want him driven. And I really, REALLY need him to have goals, be focused, and just be the perfect package for success. NON NEGOTIABLE.
3) Should be at least 4 inches taller than I am. (I'm 5'3)
4) Should have nice socks. All the time. No worn out socks please.
5) Should be able to finish a Charlie's double black angus with fries on the side and Buffalo wings to share with me.
6) Plays basketball with friends, preferably on a weekday night or a weekend morning.
7) Its not necessary for him to be outdoorsy, but I can't have him whining when I'm trying to be outdoorsy.
8) No gangsta music please.
9) Snores.
10) good skin is a plus. I want nice genes for future babies.
11) Last name should have at least 2 syllables.
12) I want him to be the type of guy who gets eternally annoyed when I ask him to buy me flowers. But he'll buy me anyway.
13) At least 6 years older.
14) Does not get easily bullied by me.
15) Difficult.
16) Has reasonably high levels of E.Q.
17) Should be able to carry a conversation with my brothers. :|
18) Should be able to hang out with my brothers' friends. :|
19) Should be liked by my brothers. :| :| :|
20) He will control me when I don't wanna be controlled.
21) And he will be mad when I try to control him.
22)  I should see a bit of his dorsal venous in his hand and lower arm. Like a golfer's arm. But doesn't necessarily need to play golf. I just like strong hands. That's all.
23) SHOULD NOT BE OBSESSED WITH CARS. ergh.
24) I don't want him to have a small digicam.
25) Likes to travel.
26) Likes nice hotels.
27) He should know the ins and outs of his business.
28) He should know something about fixing cars.
29) It should be ok for him to wear board shorts anywhere.
30) Please let him look dashingly debonaire whenever I need him to.
31) He's not magastos.
32) And he will influence me to be not magastos.
33) He can be a picky eater.
34) His car is makalat.
35) He doesn't approve of my horseback riding, but won't stop me from riding anyway.
36) Knows his math.
37) Ok narin kahit di magaling sa grammar.
38) It should be ok for him to wear butas butas na Tshirt.
39) He shouldn't have enough care to follow this blog, or any other blog.
40) Hates colored nails.
41) He cannot NOT like dogs.
42) Hould be scared of cats, cockroaches and bees.
43) Can't be needy.
44) Won't tolerate me being needy.
45) I'm bored na pakshet. Kay Batman nalang ako.

Time ended: 9:11pm

Bedtime Horrors.

I have taken babysitting to the next level--- I took Chanelle to Anilao with me for 3 nights. 

I bought her a complete set of gear perfect for the Anilao baby warrior.

I also bought her an inflatable boat that didn't have paddles with the set. BIG MISTAKE. She bugged me non stop until I was able to produce a definitely-not-kid-friendly paddle made from plywood. 

And you know how my mom denies her excitement for an apo? Tsk tsk. 

Poor Chanelle, by our second day she was literally running away from my mom. She hated the gigil kisses and gigil hugs. Kawawang harassed na bata.

3 nights = 3 bedtime dramas. QUE HORROR. 

Night #1: We left manila at around 1030pm. She fell asleep the moment we got to EDSA until we arrived at the resort at around 1230am. I was praying so hard that she wouldn't wake up because waking up means being up until 4am. But she woke up. and yes, we were up bargaining for sleep time until 4am. :|

Night #2: She took a nap mid afternoon but I made sure to wake her up and make her swim and play and scream all she wanted to make bedtime easier. Was it easier? NO. It took 2 hours of bedtime stories and questions and answers before she decided to sleep. Oh, and this is how she is when she's really sleepy and trying her best to be awake and entertain me. Mali mali na grammar mo, teh, tulog na tayo.

Night #3: War is war. She swam and ran around the pool THE WHOLE DAY. By 630pm she was already starting the drama at the dinner table. I fed her a little rice and a cup of yogurt. She was crying and telling me she wanted to sleep so I took her to bed. But uh oh, nakaramdam lang ng aircon new wave of energy nanaman. HUHUHU. She was obviously sleepy and was just trying to fight it. By 8pm she was complaining of hunger, so I had to be "mad" and told her that she had to eat when it was eating time and sleep when it was sleeping time. But I'm not a bad aunt naman, so I took her to the dining and gave her rice again, but this time, I left her alone on one table while I was on another. She was not allowed to speak to anyone (because if she was, she'd only ask for bottomless iced tea). She was "punished" for being difficult and for not eating at the right time and asking for food when it's bedtime. 5 minutes to her punishment, she was asleep. :| 

Crazy little girl. She's mastered the art of living the resort life, asking everyone to give her more iced tea and yogurt. She would go out on her own and ask someone to turn the TV on to Playhouse Disney.  She'd ask resort guests to fix her snorkel and swim with her. She's the definition of friendly. We were kinda worried that she'd feel homesick and ask for her mom and dad, but she never did. Nagtampo na nga mom and dad nya eh. HAHA. 

Ask her if she had fun and she'd say yes. She's willing to go 5 nights straight. But ask me the same? I'd say I had fun. But 3 nights is enough. Baka pumayat na ako pag 5 pa yan. ;)

I <3 Chanelle. Can't wait for the next love-hate trip with this kid. 

Chanelle

Meet the world's most low-maintenance kid, my 4 year old niece Chanelle.

Last night, she decided to come to our house and have her first-ever sleepover. Yes, it was an exciting time for us because she just turned 4 and it's her first time to spend the night in someone else's house without her mommy and daddy. 

Watch how incredibly independent she is.

I think I have experienced the most drama-less babysitting in baby history. She was pleasant the whole time. She knew how to say please and say thank you. She'd automatically say sorry if she caused a little mess. And if it's not enough, she'd say "I'm REALLY sorry, aunty Bea". 

But the highlight of her stay was bedtime. I have never seen or ever imagined someone be this disoriented during sleep. :| 

Please watch til the end and please forgive the snickering and the snorting and the annoying background talking. 

I haven't laughed so hard for quite sometime now. Me and Iris were laughing for around 20 minutes. I was already tearing.

When she woke up in the morning, first thing she told me was: "good morning aunty Bea, it's already daytime. Can I play bubbles?"

hihi. I love this kid. I wouldn't call her baby or any other cutesy patootsie baby pet names. She's a big girl now and she's ready to have more sleepovers soon. 

P.s.

I really should be careful with what I say and do around her. She's a frickin' sponge it scares me. Her mom and dad might kill me eh. haha.

Breakfast 3-31-11

Ma: Kakainin niyo ba yun croissant?

Bea: Where?

Ma: There! Sa box ng Breadtalk.

Bea: Puro floss lang yan, no croissant.

Ma: Pinasok ko dyan, para kunwari Breadtalk. Binili ko sa Bretto's.

Bea: Uhhh... okay. (checks the box, sees a non-crusty but perfectly shaped croissants)
        Ma, ayaw ko kainin. It doesn't look good. It's not crusty.

Ma: Oo nga hindi crusty. Hindi talaga sya dapat crusty. Pag crusty ibig sabihin too much butter.

Bea: Ma diba dapat ang croissant crusty? That's the point.

Ma: Well, it's not a real croissant. I'm just trying to trick you and Vic to eat fake croissants. (VILLAINOUS laugh)

Bea: ?!? K.

***I don't know ma. Why. Why???